Sunday, June 04, 2006
Is President Bush a Girly Man?
WayneMadsenReport.com
June 4, 2006 -- More on George W. Bush's "Sanctity of Marriage" gay marriage constitutional ban.
George W. Bush's marital problems have just taken another turn for the worse. Apparently, Mr. Bush has not only engaged in an extra-marital affair with a member of the opposite sex who is also a senior member of his Cabinet, but also a member of the same sex. WMR received the following release this morning from Leola McConnell, Democratic candidate for Governor of Nevada (who has been endorsed by WMR). McConnell is a one-time professional dominatrix.
"President Bush's speech to the nation Monday. If he doesn't say he's a gay American or at the least a bisexual one then he shouldn't be making one at all. And the notion that it would be in regards to writing bigotry into our nation's Constitution is reprehensible.
Too bad it isn't me doing the rebuttal because in 1984, I watched him perform (with the enthusiasm of homosexual male who had done this many times before) a homosexual act on another man, namely Victor Ashe. Victor Ashe is the current Ambassador to the nation of Poland who should also come out like former Governor McGreevey of New Jersey and admit to being a gay American. Other homo-erotic acts were also performed by then private citizen George Bush because I performed one of them on him personally.
I am the woman this website (bushssecretlifein84.tripod.com) speaks of that has been posted on the net nearly two years now. None of this would be the business of anyone but President Bush's little ruse to save his failed presidency by using DOMA [Defense of Marriage Act] to divide Americans one from the other has to be exposed as the act of a desperate closeted homosexual man. The only crime in being GLBT is in the hiding.
The President needs to come clean with the American people about his own past sexual behavior before he tries to besmirch the humanity of people in search of sincerely committing to the same bonds of matrimony he's afforded. He violated his own vows of monogamy having a homosexual affair with a long time family friend of whom his wife had no knowledge.
His hypocrisy seems to know no bounds. I had planned to run for governor of Nevada without going into any of this but his planned nationally televised address to the nation makes it necessary for me to address his attempt at division in as public a way as he picked to try this Bushification of reality regarding same sex marriages.
Sincerely,
Leola McConnell
Liberal Democratic candidate for Governor of Nevada"
Related Commentary on DULY CONSIDER - Bush Gay Ban Pandering
Is President Bush a Girly Man? (HUMOR)
by Betty Bowers
Article
Friday, June 02, 2006
Is Ann Coulter A Man? If So--She's Got Balls!
Press Briefing by the President
THE PRESIDENT: Good morning. Please be seated. Let's get right down to business. This morning, I am joined here at the presidential podium by my good friend and tireless champion - the lovely and talented Ms. Ann Coulter.
MISS COULTER: That's "Miss Coulter," not "Ms."
THE PRESIDENT: My mistake. Please forgive me.
MISS COULTER: I would never be known as Ms. Coulter. "Ms." is liberal, Gloria Steinem code for "Attention all fat, hairy bull dykes within earshot! My hot clam requests the pleasure of your filthy tongue's epileptic company!"
THE PRESIDENT: I did not know that. But let's move on, because I am hopping mad. Earlier this morning, when I received my daily 5AM singing "Wake Up, Sleepyhead" call from Karen Hughes in Texas, I learned about a vicious, unsubstantiated, HATEFUL rumor which is being spread about Miss Coulter. Namely, that she is in fact a man.
MISS COULTER: This is exactly the kind of liberal lie that I expose in my book Slander, which is now available at fine booksellers nationwide (and online) for the almost offensively low sale price of $15.00. In this 240-page masterpiece, I effortlessly and brilliantly debunk every liberal myth about conservatives. Preposterous myths - like how we secretly hate kikes, jigaboos, gooks, faggots, spicks, and sand niggers - but have lately taken to twisting things around and make it sound like it's really the liberals who hate them.
THE PRESIDENT: And you do a splendid job of it, Ann.
MISS COULTER: I know that! I don't need you to tell me how splendid I am. Anyway, I thought we were talking about my book.
THE PRESIDENT: Actually, no, we're here because I want to help clear up this nonsense about you really being a man. Now I want everyone to know - there's simply no way this can be true. Never mind Ann's rich, gravelly baritone, her commanding height and forceful jawline - or the fact that she arm wrestles Arnold Schwarzenegger under the table every year at the GOP celebrity retreat in Branson, Missouri. Because yes, Miss Coulter is in fact a genuine piece of Grade-A poontang, and will one day soon become successfully impregnated by a wealthy and statuesque Aryan stallion, at which time she'll do like a good Republican lady and quit all this silly "working" and "pretending to know what she's talking about" and wearing "lady pantsuits." So I want you to all to read my lips and get this through your thick skulls: Ann Coulter has always been, and always will be a woman.
MISS COULTER: It's hardly a surprise that liberals would concoct such an absurd lie about me. They do it all the time. In fact, coming up with sickening lies about formerly flat-chested good girls who wear size 15 pumps is an integral part of one of their most important daily rituals - the ceremonial vivisection and cannibalization of living, white human infants.
THE PRESIDENT: Is that a fact?
MISS COULTER: Absolutely. And when they're done feasting on the tender young flesh of the white race, they regroup several hours later to defecate together on rug-sized reproductions of the United States Constitution. And then of course, they pray to Satan and Allah while strapping each other into latex gravity boot systems so they can hang upside down like rabid, naked fruit bats for the rest of the day and watch Phil Donahue on MSNBC while urine runs down their inverted torsos and in to their hideous, liberal, gaping maws!
THE PRESIDENT: The depth and accuracy of your knowledge never fails to amaze, Ann.
MISS COULTER: Don't patronize me. It won't work - because I haven't forgotten how you cozied up with Mr. Fatso Slut Murderer - Ted Kennedy - to write that Socialist education bill earlier this year. So tell me, President Bipartisan Lovefest, are you actually a liberal?
THE PRESIDENT: You know, I think I've successfully diffused this silly notion of you being a man. Why don't we wrap this up, Ann?
MISS COULTER: Answer the question! Are you now or have you ever been a member of the liberal intelligentsia?! Did you not attend Yale and Harvard Universities? Were you not born in CONNECTICUT?! Oh wait, so was I. Never mind on that one.
THE PRESIDENT: Guard! Please show Miss Coulter the door.
MISS COULTER: You can run from the truth, but you can't hide, LIBERAL! TRAITOR! I've got a throbbing eight-inch staff of conservative payback in my panties that's got your name written all over it!! So come on over and take it like a man!
THE PRESIDENT: Take her away, boys.
MISS COULTER: It's just a matter of time! The real right-wing of this country will have its revenge! We will storm your...
(Secret Service Scuffling & Muffled, Gruff Yelling.)
THE PRESIDENT: Thank you all for coming. God Bless America.
Raising Twin Harlots Can Be Difficult
Laura Bush is interviewed for the first time on the difficulties of raising her twin harlots. This story is possibly the funniest I have read on the net. The funniest thing is the painful poetic jusctice that is the truth. Betty Bowers reports: